Reflections on my year of service - April · 10.04.19, 9:49pm
So much has happened in the three months since I’ve moved to Philadelphia. Life has been crazy, chaotic, challenging, and in the moments of calm I have, I have not chosen to blog. I chose to watch hulu and youtube because I didn’t want to think or reflect or read anything too mentally stimulating. I wanted to put my mind at rest. Get immersed in cooking my dinner, or exercising when I had the time and energy—savoring the peaceful moments I had for myself as well as the time I spent with others.
I have always used this blog as a release of mind—be it ranting, or random musings…but always for reflection. I believe it to be healthy to reflect on life on a regular basis. Especially when so much has been changing around me, much without my control—reflection is a necessity. This weekend was finally my time to do so.
What did I reflect on?
On my goals and dreams—though that sounds so cheesy.
On what makes me happy and fulfills me.
On happiness, and what it means, how it is defined, and how I treat the idea of happiness in my own life.
What it means to know yourself, know your needs, and know what is right for you. How to tell when you know, and if that is possible.
On confidence and conviction, and self-trust.
On passion, passionate work, and how passionate work can define you/your life, and being cognizant of other aspects of life that are important: family, friendships, and other such relationships.
On choices, on the future, on my “career”.
On patience: Patience with myself and letting myself take the time to discover my true self, my true needs and desires.
On understanding that happiness is always changing, and cannot be found like an object or as I said to my friend “it can’t be so easily defined and squared away in a box, in a role, or a task or a career.”
On peace and peace of mind.
On realizing that there is a reason why I am where I am in my life, even though I will always be wondering what is coming next. To be patient and present with the present, respect each moment for what it is and find the positive aspects of every challenge or in the face of adversity. To learn from each moment and focus on the details of that moment, instead of always looking ahead for what might be coming or what might be “better”.
On becoming comfortable with the process of change, discovering: Knowing that change is inevitable, good, and natural. Taking the time to recognize change and respect it even & especially when it occurs within myself. To view change without fear or apprehension, but calm and understanding. To incorporate study with change, to shape my life with the knowledge of it.
More later. :) Time for bed.
♥♥
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